It's already 6 days into 2009.  And I'm still biting my nails, not going to the doctor when I am feeling ill, showing up late, not talking to my parents as often as I should, being cluttered and messy, and not saving reciepts.

This year I want to attempt to change all of the above.

I am going to stop biting my nails.  I want long pretty nails that I can paint and decorate.  My nails are gross right now.

I am going to go to the doctor when I am not feeling well.  It's a stupid fear/habit to NOT go...so I really should just suck it up, take advantage of the insurance I pay for, and just go.

Last year I fell into the habit of showing up late.  Be it to work, a show, a friend's house, paying a bill...I just started being late to everything.  his one will take some time to break, but I plan to be at work at 9:30 every morning as planned, and all bills paid on time.

I need to talk to my family more.  How often...I don't know.  But once every two weeks is not enough.  They are my roots, and they'll be there for me no matter what, so I should really keep up with them and stop making excuses.  I need to go back tot he west coast - as much as I don't ever want to LIVE there again, I really need to go back for my sanity.

I will stop leaving stuff piled up in my room/car.  There is a place for everything, and if there is no place for it, I probably don't need it anyway.  I want to sort through my belongings and sell/donate as much as I can.

I will start saving and filing every reciept TODAY.  I want to know what I'm spending money on, what I'm wasting money on, and what I can get back in tax season next year :)

I just got home from possibly one of the best performances I will see in 2009.  Easily one of the best performances I've ever seen in Nashville.

It was a once-in-a-lifetime lineup at the Ryman Auditorium, starring the Jonas Brothers...with their friends/guests: Amy Grant, Vince Gill, Honor Society, Michael W. Smith, Phil Vassar, Steven Curtis Chapman, Jordin Sparks, Brad Paisley, Martina McBride (!)... am I missing anyone? Tim McGraw and Faith Hill didn't sing anything, but made a guest appearance as the announcers of the opening of the show.  And one of the guys from Blue County made an appearance in the audience.  Apparently Jordin Pruitt was there too.  I think I got them all!

I wish I had more time to go more indepth with my details.  Needless to say, the Jonas boys have proven themselves time and time again as more than just another cookie-cutter Disney boyband (not that theres anything wrong with cookie cutter disney boybands anyway), but this show alone sets them on SUCH a higher pedestal than they were before.

Some highlights of my evening were the slower rendition of "Tonight", Martina McBride lending her vocals on "When You Look Me In The Eyes", ALL the guys comin' out to play a song (don't even know the song...but it was aaaawesome), Amy Grant "Baby Baby", Brad Paisley and Jonas singing "Waitin' On a Woman", and the crowning jewel: "Cinderella" with Steven Curtis Chapman that got me bawling before the song even started.

It was just REALLY awesome to see such high-profile people up onstage with the Jonas boys...who I will never fully understand or realize their fame.

Fellow One Love bloggers Honor Society took the stage for a song or two.  They looked and sounded great!  I was excited to finally see them after hearing so much about them (most of which has been good) :)

I met up with MORE fellow bloggers Kat, Janice, and Chris and some cool friends for some post-show hanging out, and food!

Thanks to everyone for a fabulous night!  I'm off to sleep, and dream about the fact that I just FINALLY saw SCC, and it happened to be with JB!

2009 is only mere hours away now, and I'm so ready!  I reached certain levels of closure last night, and I will continue making that closure tonight.  2008 was a good platform, but I'm ready to jump into 2009 now!!!

I'll write out my resolutions on my way back to Tennessee.  No cliche weight loss on there...stop biting my nails will deffo be on there.

any tips?

I just parked in Brooklyn, and the magic has already begun.

Tonight, Brinn and I will sit to the left of 2 of my favorite Broadway actors/lovers, in character, before heading to the bars to ring in the first night in NYC.

Tomorrow, I will sit across the room from one of my heroes as he sings Christmas songs after Christmas in December...probably after a long day of shopping and tourist-style photoshoots.

Tuesday, I will sit beside a good friend while she looks in the mirror at a version of herself singing about Purple Summer onstage.

Wednesday, I will sing and dance and drink and be merry with all of my friends as we ring in 2009!

Thursday...will be the beginning of a new year, and a GREAT year.  2009 couldn't come any sooner, or any better.

I'm in New York now...trip blogs to follow :)

Every day your life changes.  Lauren's latest ____years ago today blog proves that! :)

But some days and some feelings really stick out in your mind.

2 years ago, I was on my way home to Nashville, after being in Seattle for Christmas.  I hadn't started my new job yet...and I was scheming with Cassie to go to NYC for New Years Eve.  That trip ended up changing my life.  I've been back to the city dozens of times since, and made and mept some of the most amazing friends :)

7 months ago today, I fell in love.  Melchior, Moritz, and Hanschen became normal names to me.  Them and Duncan, and all of their school friends became a huge part of my life.  They sang the songs that spoke to my heart, and made me laugh, cry, and smile from the stage.  I've been back to see them a few times since...and I'll see them again on the 29th and 30th.  One last time on the big stage.

A week ago today, almost exactly to the minute, I met the guy I believe to be my soulmate.  He's going to call back in 2009.  2009 couldn't come any sooner.

Get ready NYC and 2009...we're on our way....

This Christmas was rather exciting!!!  I got quite a few fun gifts :)  Since other people made lists, I'll share highlights of mine too:

- Scouting For Girls hoodie (I screamed when I opened this one!)
-Russell Brand My Booky Wook autobiography
- Robot hoodie and painting
- Across the Universe strawberry necklace
- Boots!!!
- A few different colored V-necks
- A sweater from my auntie
- knee-high socks
- baking cups with feet (hehe)
- a snuggie!!!!
- Cheese.
- I bought and taught myself The Secret
- Various British candies
- The Jonas Bros. Burnin' Up book
- Mamma Mia! on DVD :)
- Chapstick
- A lil notebook for in my purse (it's high school musical!)
- A meal at Chipotle (Nashville doesnt have Chipotle!)
- And a wonderous joyful adventure to Boston to visit my family!

I'm off to watch Mamma Mia! with my fam now! Dancing queeeeeen!

Boston!!!

Yknow, I actually haven't even been to Boston yet.  Just Providence, RI, Canton, MA, Stoughton, MA (yeah Brinn...Lori McKenna's hometown!), Sharon, MA, and Milton, MA so far.

I landed in Providence, RI yesterday morning, and sat in the airport writing text messages to myself for later blog ideas (I want to write an epic blog about why I have a deep joy and passion set aside for the airport, and traveling, and watching other people travel), and reading The Secret while waiting for my Aunt Patti and Uncle George to pick me up.  Patti had to work later than she thought, but it's okay...I had a Secret to learn.

The Secret would have seemed COMPLETELY bogus to me years ago, or if I didn't already believe and practice some of the teachings.  I am excited to put my own religious experiences and beliefs in line with The Secret.  I already had something in my mind (to be described possibly later in this blog....and I know to be in a future blog) when I was reading the book - but after the past two days, I know EXACTLY what to visualize, and exactly what I want.  Not how, but what.  And that's where The Secret will fall into place.  I probably sound like a freak, but seriously people...read it and decide for yourself if you want to take the knowledge and use it.  It's going to take some good mind-training, but I am excited to see where it takes me.

So yesterday, I went straight from the airport to church.  I dreaded going to church with my family, as I thought they would be going to the same traditional Catholic service I had been to as a kid when I came to visit.  Nothing against Catholics at all - it just isn't my personal religion of choice, and the practices of the church I visited as a kid were very uncomfortable for me.  But I know how much it means to my aunt and grammy, so I decided it was okay to go.  We ended up going to a whole different church (my fam switched churches), and they did the children's Nativity play, and it was SO ADORABLE!!!!

When we got there, the little old church was already almost full.  My cousin Andy and his wife Erin were saving seats for Patti, Cousin George, Cousin Rachel, Nathan, and me.  I got to meet my first cousins twice removed (or something), and they are SO SO SO cute.  If you know one thing about me, it's probably that I dont like kids.  But oh my GOD.  These little first cousinstwice removed (or soemthing) are adorableeeee.

We got back to Patti's house in Canton, MA and I took a power-nap.  We headed to Andy and Erin's house afterward for Christmas party number one (of five...).  Erin's family was all there - mom, dad, etc, which was pretty cool to be a part of.  Erin cooked a FANTASTIC meal, and reminded me that I really need to start cooking again.  Everyone at this party was with their new wife/husband, introducing a fiance or gf/bf, or talking about the spouse that couldn't make it.  My cousin's wife's brother (what is the relation there?) was showing us his save-the-date announcements for his wedding this summer...they're printed to look like Red Sox season tickets.  Amazing.  I missed being with people that live Fever Pitch every day hahahaha

Christmas party #2 was this morning at Uncle George's sister's (?) place.  Not my family (George is my dad's sister Patti's husband), but that's okay!  They welcomed me with open arms, and I fit right in :)  I was introduced to Geroge's family, and all of their significant others, and spent a lot of time talking boy bands with the 11-13 y/o girl crowd.  Typical.

Christmas party #3 was tonight!  Grammy and Uncle Phil joined me, Patti, George, George, Marissa, Rachel, Nathan, Andy, Erin, Bredan, Aidan, and Zach (PHEW).  Uncle Phil and I played the "I'm too busy with work, that's why I'm single" card together when people asked.  Jade says it's a good crutch.  I agree.

But I kept thinking about how out-of-place I was.  21 is young, I know.  But here I was...single in a room of beautiful relationships 3 times in a row.  Soon to be 5 in a row.  I'm using The Secret to turn that around.  Next year at this time, I plan to be in the same room with the same people...and a special someone on my arm.  He will fit in perfectly with my family.  He'll help do dishes after we eat, and talk Red Sox baseball and Bruins hockey with the guys while I get the family gossip with the girls.  He'll chase the first cousins twice removed (or whatever) with the dogs, and I'll fill up his dessert plate with Grammy's s'mores bars.  The next two parties this weekend, I'm going to spend the entire time imagining what it's going to be like next year.  Maybe we'll even be included in the couples gift exchange!  That sounds good.  We'll give a good gift to the couple we pick out of the hat.  Maybe season tickets haha

So tomorrow they'll all start going back to work.  I might go into Boston with George and his girlfriend to go to a museum, shop, maybe the Aquarium.  Any suggestions?  

Uncle Paul and Aunt Stephanie and their 2 kids (whom I haven't met!) are coming over tomorrow night for party #3.  More ham and spinach squares!  Then the rest of the clan (Uncle Steve, Aunt Cathy, and their boys...plus everyone else that was here, and possibly some of MY friends...Brinn, and poss Ben my old college neigbor??) will be coming for party #5 on Saturday!  Sunday I head down to NYC, and I couldn't be more thrilled.

 11:30 on the 29th will be fabulous...get ready Joe's Pub.  I'll probably cry.

Tomorrow at this time, I plan to be asleep in my Nashville bed for one last set of Nashville ZzZzzzZZZs of 2008.

I spent my last friend-night in Nashville with Jade.  She's pretty much the only one left here.  I thought she left Saturday, but she did not.  She is still here, so we've been gushing about boys, and acting like 12-year-olds for the past couple of nights.  We had a sleepover with junk food, and a movie night with probably the worst movie for me right now hahahaha

All in all, I think the past few social outings were a good wrap-up to 2008 social life (with a couple of exceptions).

The rest of my 2008 is pretty packed!

23rd: Working, packing, getting some sleep!

24th: Waking up at like 4am to go to the airport, and flying to Boston.

25th-27th: Hangin out in Boston with my family whom I have not seen in like 8 years (good lord!)

27th: Taking a bus (or train?) to NYC.  Going to a show with Brinn, who is meeting up with me there.

28th: Moving into Lauren's apartment for the week.  Rockin' NYC like it's nobody's biz.

29th: Spring Awakening Holiday concert at Joe's.  I practically peed myself when I spotted this one online.

30th: Spring Awakening night show.  I have onstage seats again.  I'm not next to any cast members. But I'm gonna cry because I think this is quite possibly the last time I will ever see Matt Doyle as Hanschen ever again :(

31st: New Years EVE!!!!  Partying with Jade, Brinn, and possibly others.  Oh, and LADY EFFIN GAGA!

1st: New Years Day! 2009!!!!!! will be for recoup-ing.  And possibly leaving for Virginia.

2nd: Virginia with Brinn and possibly Slaur.

3rd: Driving back to Nashville.

4th: JONAS BROTHERS AND FRIENDS AT RYMAN AUDITORIUM!!!!

5th: Back to work, and on to the beginning of real life in 2009!!!!!!!!!!!

I am SO ready for 2009.  Is it bad that I want to skip over my "work" day tomorrow, and completely skip my family Christmas...just so I can get to 2009 sooner?  Goodbye 2008, I'm ready for you to be done.  I'm ready to take 2009 and run! :)

and I was hooked.
The oracle told me this was a game, and it asked me if I wanted to play along.
Sitting by the phone waiting for it to ring used to be the only game I played.
I'm only playing along if the rules have changed. 
It's almost 2009.  I'm not waiting for a phone to ring while someone else ignores the "ping" of a text message that he asked for.
I'm eating chips and cream cheese, listening to the longings of a friend, driving in my little red car, working at my kickass job, listening to my music, eating sushi, traveling to my family, living my life.  If you call, you call.  If you don't, then what has changed, really?
You say you like a confident girl, one who's not afraid of the world, and one who will speak her mind.  I'm confident enough to go back to "real life" with the small hope of a simple call or text.  But it won't break me if you don't.  While I may want you, I do not need you.  I know this. 
Keep reminding me, as I often forget. 
I'm never good at the game...but I'm ready to win this time.  Are you on my team?

So here I go...

Leona Lewis just released her cover of "Run" in the USA iTunes store.  I was so prepared to import her album for a 3rd time just to get this song on the deluxe package (it's a good CD and she keeps adding songs!).  Thank you Leona for saving me like $30.

Other good things about iTunes today are:

- The Real You (thank you lauren for introducing me to that band. they are amaze)

- Lady GaGa's Christmas single

- Eric Hutchinson's cheesy "Rock n Roll" music video is FREEeeeEEEee!

Last night I got to see Jon McLaughlin for the first time EVER!  I've been a big fan of his music for yearssss now.  He's another one of those artists like Teddy Geiger and Copeland... I've had tickets, or plans to go to his shows quite a few times before, but it's fallen through every time for one reason or another.

My roomie Cathy interned for the concert promoter of his show last semester, and she got me and Brinn tickets to see him and Colbie Callait last night!!! (side note: colbie was WAY better than the last time I saw her perform)

We pulled up RIGHT at 9pm (showtime), and I could hear the music from the parking lot...and the line into the door was stretched out into the parking lot.  I was missing Jon McLaughlin AGAIN!!! (Noooo!)  I was crushed.  Witnesses would probably roll their eyes at this, but honestly...I tried to hold it together...really, I did...but after missing Gaga/BLG/Metstay, and Rachael Ray all in the course of a few days...I wasn't about to miss Jon McLaughlin a 6th time without getting superupset.

Cathy and Brinn were awesome and let me go be emo on the side of the building while I attempted to hear the songs through the walls.
It was bittersweet...being so close, yet so far...but SO amazing to finally hear him singing songs like "Beautiful Disaster" "Beating My Heart" "Human" and "Already In" live, and hearing people cheering and singing along :)

We got in the doors in the middle of his third-to-last song.  The moment I saw him onstage, I literally grabbed Brinn and started crying.  Wow.  Looking back...how lame am I? lol
I haven't been THAT emotional over an artist in a long time.  I think it's just legendary that I've missed him so many times, and his music just makes me soooo dang emotional that it's stupid haha  I LOVE the feeling of having that much emotional connection to a song, that all you can do it just stand and hug someone and cry.

He ended the show with "Industry" (possibly his best song), and Brinn and I sang and danced along in the crowd...something I was beginning to think I may not ever have the chance to ACTUALLY do.

Thank you Cathy for the tickets, and Brinn for sharing my moments of "American Roy" with me :)

unexpected, understatement of the year and thats for sure,
who'd of thought that i'd be standing at your door?

 This reminded me of a post Jade made almost a year ago...

Times Square on New Years Eve. It's been my home for December 31st-January 1st for two years now. This year, I won't dance in the confetti...but I'll be dancing in the raining balloons instead.

Mixed in with the sponsors' confetti that magically floats down from the rooftops of Times Square buildings, are bits of colored paper. Some are printed from a computer, and others are handwritten notes. Many are scrawled in all different languages. All of them are your wishes for the upcoming year.

People like you and I are invited to send in (or write down, if you are NYC local!) our goals, dreams, and wishes for 2009. What do YOU want in 2009? I've heard 2009 is the new 2005. Since that is the case, bring on the dreams and wishes!!
Click here for more infoz, or to submit your wish online. 

My wishes are going to flutter down into someone's big red foam New Years hat...I just know it.

OMG!
I just drove my friend Kami to the airport.  She is going to NYC to see Michael Buble, and I am jealous.
On my way back to work, Jessica called me to tell me my cooking idol Rachael Ray is coming to a mall near Nashville for a book signing next week, and only the first 500 people who get tickets/books can get in.

And I got a ticket that entitles me to 2 adults and one child to get in and get the Big Orange Book signed!  Any adult, and any child want to join me?

I'm going to FLIP OUT.

So my parents and I decided to get a head start on our holiday shopping.

I didn't buy anything yet, because the exclusive early-bird sales were pretty lame, and hte lines weren't worth it, but I did write down some AWESOME gift ideas that I will go back for later in the Black Friday holiday.

We caught wind that the mall was opening at 12:00 midnight, and decided it would be a fun idea to start off Black Friday right there in the middle of it all.  The news showed no sign of human life, so we imagined we'd be the only ones in the mall.

On the way there, there was a sudden traffic jam.  Probably about 1/4 mile out from the exit to the mall.  all 4 lanes of traffic stopped...and I almost got crashed into (aaah!).  ALL of these cars were trying to get over into the other lane to go to the mall!!!

It was like trying to find a parking spot at the grocery store on Superbowl Sunday.  It was insaaaaaaane!!!!

The mall was PACKED.  It was hard to even walk.  It was AMAZINGGGGGG.  I'm obsessed with crowds, and holiday shopping is my favorite season of all.

I'm so glad I experienced this midnight shopping extravaganza.  When else can you go shopping at the mall at midnight and actually ahve stores be open???  My entire internal clock is completely thrown off now...

Off to sleep, then waking up to catch some more doorbuster deals at Big Lots, Target, World Market, and more!!!  Eating BBQ at Jim n Nick's tomorrow :)  I <3 when parents come to visit!

Happy Black Friday everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Amazon.com has some AWESOME deals on full albums every day.  There's always a deal of the day that is anywhere from 99 cents to $3.99 for some GREAT albums.  Every weekend they have a "5 for Friday" special (5 digital albums for $5)

For the holiday weekend, they made a special list of 50 albums!  I'm ready to shop...theres some steals in this list.  Go set forth and buy!!! Click here.

My family has a few Thanksgiving traditions:

1) We haven't had a FAMILY Thanksgiving dinner for a few years.  We started a tradition when we moved to Oregon, to take in all the "orphans"...people from work or school that don't have a family to eat Thanksgiving dinner with.  I'm excited to keep this tradition going here in Nashville.  Jade and a few other friends will be joining my parents and me for Thanksgiving dinner this year.

2) My sister and I watch the Macy's parade on TV together.  Last year this tradition was broken...but I was able to watch on the plane while she was watching back in Oregon.  This year, we'll probably both sleep through it...we'll see...

3) There's always a turkey and a Tofurkey (my sister is a vegetarian).  This year, she won't be around...so we'll only have one bird, and it was once living.

4) Black Friday shopping.  We wake up at the buttcrack of dawn just to get good deals on crap.  Always fun :)

5) Cranberry sauce shaped like a can.  Needs no explanation.

6) Last, but not least, if you ever sit at our Thanksgiving dinner table, you should be prepared.  My dad will, at some point during the meal, ask for everyone to go around and say one thing they're thankful for.  Some years this is very serious.  Other years, it's turned into a joke.  I always wonder what turn the "thankful" tradition will take every year.  Last year we kept going around the table until we were all crying from laughing so hard.

This year, I'm already thankful for so much.  I wonder what I'll pick to be thankful for at dinner tomorrow...

If you were at my dinner table tomorrow evening, what would share as something you are thankful for?

Just a quick update on what's up.  I haven't written just a "what's going on" blog in a while.

Work has been CRAZY...I've been setting up sales in all of my artists' online stores to launch on Black Friday.  I've almost got everything done...wish me luck with little-to-no problems tomorrow!!!

My parents are coming to Nashville on Thursday evening.  Jade is staying in Nashville for Thanksgiving, so she and I are going to cook a FEAST!!!! I'm really excited.  It sounds way better than going to Cracker Barrel (which is my dad's idea of the ideal food...don't worry, I'll take him there before he goes back home).  Jade and I are going to make green bean casserole, turkey, squash, and goodness knows what else.  Yummay!

Last weekend, Cathy and I went to Atlanta to see The Hush Sound, The Spill Canvas, Augustana, and OneRepublic.  It was a fantastic show.  I love love love Augustana, and I'm in love with Ryan Tedder from OneRepublic....so I was dying the entire night.  The show was at the Tebernacle, which is famous in my circle of friends for an experience they had with a "Peegina" there.  It's famous in my mind for Leavin' The Game on Luckie Street, which I now know at least a few One Lovers will know what that means in the world of Butch Walker...

I plan to go shopping tomorrow for food and Christmas decorations...then decorate a bit with said decorations.

I am going shopping with Norman and Pammy on Friday...it's tradition...  I finally figured out what to get everyone except Cathy, Cassie, Brinn, my boss, my interns, and my coworkers for Christmas.  So that means I really haven't figured out much.  Any ideas?  Let me know...  I'm just glad I finally decided what to get Jade haha

The Jonas Brothers had a "secret show" after the AMAs, and I am just dying over the videos.  I still get excited for them when I see them playing huuuuge venues, and seeing them in this small venue, and having an awesome star-studded event (Dan Ackroyd...srsly?!?!) is just awesome at this point.  I LOVE that they are not ashamed to be pop musicians.  They KNOW theyre pop, and they aren't afraid of it...they embrace it, and they introduce their audience to some awesome OTHER music (youtube up some of the covers they do).  I just think it's rad.  And I'm a biased jonas fan and I'm gonna shut up before I start writing an entire blog about them.

I got tickets for myself to see Spring Awakening for what very well could be the last time :(  December 30th at 7:00pm, I'll be sitting onstage, probably crying.

I'm getting REALLY excited for the new season of Flight of the Conchords.  I'm in love with Bret and Jemaine...the previews for it make it look dumb, but trust trust it's not dumb at allllll!!!!!

Cathy got me into this other HBO comedy Summer Heights High.  Probably the biggest and weirdest WTF show I've ever seen...and yet I found myself sitting alone watching it tonight.  It's HILARIOUS.

And now I'm just rambling.  I leave you with this:

One of People Magazine's sexiest men.

It's about time I blog a bit about my charity of choice, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. I have lost a few good people to suicide, and I dealt with some scary close calls all through high school. Honestly, I'm just now learning about this foundation, but I love their mission as far as I have seen. They are here for us "survivors", and for those struggling with their own lives...and for the memory of those lives that have been cut short.

The 10th annual National Survivors of Suicide Day is taking place this Saturday all across the globe.
Survivors of suicide? I cocked my head to the side and looked puzzled the first time I heard that term. But I suppose it makes sense. "Survivors of Suicide" are the people that are left behind...the people that have had to experience the nightmarish loss of a loved one to suicide.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP) website says that the day is for "reaching out to thousands of people who have lost a loved one to suicide."
So on Saturday...reach out!

There are events taking place on Saturday - local meetings, breakout groups, and conferences - as well as an hour and a half broadcast connecting the local groups (and you can tune in on your own computer). Most of these events are for the survivors - but all are welcome to attend as a set of open arms. The broadcasts bring in mental health experts, resources for healing, Q&A sessions, and a source of emotional support.

After losing loved ones, and being friends with so many people who have lost loved ones to suicide, I have found group discussions like this to be very difficult, but overall extremely helpful. And that was a giant run on sentence.

If you want more info on the Survivors of Suicide Day, and events (and see if anything is going on in your area), click here.

On a slightly less serious note - the holiday season is upon us! I have already finished almost all of my shopping :) Need to get some books or CDs or anything Amazon-ish? Click here to do your Christmas shopping on Amazon.com, and donate 8.5% of your purchase to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. You can help fund events like the Survivors of Suicide Day conferences just by doing your regular shopping :)

I have had the 3 best interns ever.

My first intern was Kim.  We knew we couldn't live without her, so we kept her on with a paid position after her internship.  We got two new interns at the beginning of May.  They were so good that they both signed on for another semester.  Unfortunately, they both have to go, and we are not able to hire them on as paid this time :(

So I'm left with the daunting task to find two more superstars to fill their shoes.

Going through these resumes is like pulling teeth.

One guy wrote in his special skills section: "Proficient in Internet Explorer".  Seriously.

Some of these resumes, I want to stop and ask the students...are you applying to bag groceries, or do you want a job in the music biz?

If you're applying for a job or an internship, I understand that you may not have any experience yet.  That's okay.  I understand having to sell T-shirts to pay the bills, or having to bag groceries to buy your concert tickets...But that's what a cover letter is for.  Tell me what you do in your spare time that actually has to do with the position you are applying for.

I don't care that you know how to spray weed killer on plants next to the railroad tracks.  Tell me about the stickers you passed out at that concert last spring.

Next time you write a resume for a job, think about what you're applying for.  See how you can twist your experience to fit the position.  And if you can't do it on a resume, express it in a cover letter.

Words of wisdom from an annoyed Cabo.

Fin.

Barry Manilow is on Leno tonight.

I love Barry Manilow, and I don't care who knows it!!!

Be sure to head out to your local record stores on November 24th (that's a Monday) to purchase his songs of the '80s album, featuring a duet of him and Reba singing Islands in the Streams. HAHAHAHA

My parents are two of the coolest people ever.

My mom is really weird.  She is good at pretty much anything that she puts her mind to (mostly within the realm of arts and crafts...and when I say she's good, I mean shes award-winning good...which was intimidating and annoying as a child, but pretty cool now).  She is obsessed with camping and hiking, and she likes to pretend she's a cowgirl...even though she's afraid to do anything but walk on a horse.  She sends me packages every holiday season with weird stuff in them (usually ugly salt and pepper shakers - which has now become a running joke amongst my friends and family), and she gladly sends me boxes of cheese from my favorite dairy, Tillamook (YUM.).  She calls me almost every day to tell me how she learned what a "right click" was, or she learned how to hook her new iPod into the computer.

My dad goes by "Norman".  His real name is Rick, but we call him Norman, and that is a story in and of itself.  It involves a pack of buffalo, some fish, and an inactive volcano.  Norman likes fishing.  More than the average persons' father.  He fishes...probably more than I eat fast food.  Which is a lot.  He ties his own flies, which is sometimes cool to watch.  Other times, it's just funny to watch, because he gets SO into making fake bugs.  It's like watching a 5 year-old boy. haha  Norman makes the best lasagna EVER.  Yum.  He likes (or at least pretends to like) a lot of the bands I like.  I hope to take him to a Jonas Brothers show with me one day.  I feel like he would scream and jump up and down like a giddy schoolgirl.

Both of my parents are flying in to Nashville on Thanksgiving day at 4:00pm on the dot.  I'm SO so so excited to see them.  I haven't seen them since...uuuh...I think I haven't seen them since Thanksgiving of last year, if my memory serves correctly.  That's a whole year without my parents.  Before that, it had only been a couple of months.  And before that, it was only days at a time between seeing my parents.  I guess growing up does bring a lot of change.

The next week and a half or so are going to be crazy, and I am SO looking forward to having a few days off to hang out with my parents soon :)  I'm going to try and make them come out to karaoke with me :) yaaay

This is Cathy's rabbit that lives in our home.

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I copy Perez.

I broke out the Christmas music today.  Any suggestions for new music I should get this year? :)

Cathy and I went to see Duncan Sheik at my 2nd to least favorite venue in Nashville tonight (2nd only the The Muse, because The Muse smells like a junior high school locker room).

It was a fabulous treat to see Lauren Pritchard (Spring Awakening OBC Ilse) and Duncan and his band sing some of my faveo songs.

Lauren opened the show.  Her friends and fam made up about half the crowd (she used to live here), so the energy in the room was great for her.  She was slightly awkward, and her songs weren't exactly my cup of tea...but her voice is awesome!  Cathy says it reminds her of Joss Stone.  It's really smoky and soulful.  Neat.

Duncan was on next.  He played songs from his first album ("Here's a pop song!") and all of his others...and some from his new album thats coming out in January.  It's a story about ghosts.

In the middle of his set, he sang songs from Spring Awakening.  I need to go to a show that is NOT being aired on the radio.  I hear Lauren and Duncan do an amazinggggg "Totally Fucked" (or is it "Bitch Of Living"??) on the tour.

The cello player Ben Kalb is freaking gorgeous, and I WISH I'd noticed him the few times I went to the Broadway show.  I just looked at my Playbills, and he was totally in my band every time.  lame.

So yes.  I was blown awaaaay!!!  Duncan is HILARIOUS, and his new album is going to rule the world.  GHOSTS!!!!!!!!!!

Expect pictures and video soon.

*PS: Just to clarify, I meant to title my blog "Shrek".  I'm not dumb.

Lauren Eberle wrote some of the most funny status updates during the presidential debates and other campaign events over the past few months.

And I am VERY excited to be seeing more of the inappropriately presidential status updates in the next 4 years :)

I told you - I like to share my freebies and deals.

Admit it.  You just want the Twilight soundtrack for track #10.  The Rob Pattinson song.

iTunes has a version of the album with 3 extra tracks - including an extra song by Rob Pattinson, but is it really worth $11.99 for two Rob songs?

Continuing in my sharing the deal of the day...I give you the Mp3 album for $3.99 on Amazon Mp3 (aka: my new obsession).  Pay $3.99, get the track that actually made the cut before bonus features, and enjoy the rest if you so choose.  Happy shopping!

If you know me, you know I like free stuff.  I spend my entire birthday month rackin' up freebies.  I have a McDonalds Monopoly piece on my fridge right now that I plan to use for my free medium fries sometime in the next week.  I like to pass on my freebies and cheepies to my people too.

Tomorrow, if you are an American of voting age, that has registered to vote (or lives in a state where you can still register tomorrow), go exercise that right!!! Vote if you didn't yet!  Here's a small list of things you can get for free (and please feel free to add if you know of more):

1. "I voted" Sticker!
2. Star shaped donut with frosting and lil sprinkles at Krispy Kreme
3. Ice cream at Ben & Jerry's
4. Coffee at Starbucks
5. Vibrators from Babeland in New York and Seattle

Halloween photos!!!

GROUP PHOTO!!!!
Amber was a Disco queen, Jade was Tracy, I was CaRobot, Jess was a Twister board, Leigh was the hottest Scooby EVS, and Cathy was OLD GREGGGGGGG!!!!!!

Cathy was Old Gregg. The first party we went to had an "Old Gregg Off", where a guy dressed as a terrible Old Gregg attempted to outdo Cathy...and totally lost. Cathy's Baileys was a bit bigger.


Jade was Tracy Turnblad from Hairspray! She sang "Good Morning Baltimore" at the karaoke bar, and someone thought she was fromt he Broadway cast.


Jessica was a twister board. People kept groping her all night.


I was CaRobot!!!!


Tracy found SLIMERRRRRRR


Old Gregg found a vent in the street, and stood over it so his tutu blew up in the wind...probably the best part of the night hahahahaha

All in all, I think our group of friends was hte best and most festive group of costumed peeps out there all night!  We had a cab driver on the way there that played Lady GaGa really loud for us, and a driver on the way home named Ali that let us sing songs from Aladdin to him.

I danced with a lot of people as a robot.  It was fabulous, and kind of creepy sometimes.

AAAAAND now that Halloween is over (:(), it's time for CHRISTMAS (and that one holiday with the turkey) to come :)

Happy Halloween!!!!

My picture is from Halloween 2 years ago.  I was Tom Fletcher as The Hulk.

This year, I went as a robot, loosely based on the robots from Flight of the Conchords.  Expect photos soon.

"I'm actually particularly arrogant about pop music, and think that it's amazing ... And you know what? There's nothing more powerful than a song that you can play anywhere in the world at any time no matter what, and everyone gets up and dances."

I thought that was a good enough quote to share :)

Lady Gaga's CD "The Fame" was released in the US yesterday, and I bought it on my lunchbreak.  I can't take it out of my CD player, and I want to dance party now!!!  Go buy it and dance party with me!

Pop music fo lifeeeeee!!!!!

So in my blog entry about Post Secret, I told my secret.  It involved the fact that I REALLY needed to get in touch with an old friend.  Well, I got in touch with him, and talked to him for the first time in over a year today.

and he's getting MARRIED!  So I'm planning to go visit the west coast for he and Elizabeth's wedding in September.

I'm really glad I called him.  We only talked for like, 15 minutes, but it was nice to catch up and re-connect.

I got back to Nashville last night, and went back to work this morning.  The first day back from vacation has to be the weirdest, and toughest day EVER.

I'm on my lunch right now.  Just ate some really gross macaroni and beef thing.  Not buying that one again (ew).

I'm about to head back to work.  Gotta keep those Randy Travis fans at bay :)  I still have those thousands of boxes hanging out in my office, and tey'll be gone soon!

I'm debating going to a show tonight or not.  My friend is having a juice party tonight (I don't know...), and then Locksley is playing at Mercy lounge.  Sounds like it could be a fun show.  But also I'm tired.

Someone is having a Madonna dance party on Ellen, and it makes me miss New York...so I'm gonna go back to work now.

I wish I had more time to sit down and type out every detail of this past week.  But I don't.

I last posted on Wednesday night/Thursday morning.  And the following events happened between then and now:

I learned that Spring Awakening is ending its Broadway run in January.  Right after meeting the writers.  Shocking.  On that note - I have now seen the full play twice on my vacation, in addition to the CMJ panel (spent lots of time in the student rush line, and even more time soaking in the depth of the show onstage).  Eryn (the girl that performed as Ilse at the panel) played Martha this afternoon - very cool seeing her in two separate roles.  Jesse Swenson was in for the role of Hanschen yesterday evening - a bittersweet surprise, as I am a fan of Matt Doyle's Hanschen...and a fan of Jesse.  I was torn...but loved it regardless.  If you are in NYC and haven't seen this play yet - go now.  You don't have much time...so do it.  You may recall my blog where I wished for a seat where I would get kicked of spat upon.  I experienced both. HAHAHAHAHA

I went to a show at the Bowery Ballroom.  I only caught the tail end of Janelle Monae, but she was pretty dang radical.
There was a band that was kind-of bluesy, and they had a horn section - very cool.  I wish I could remember their name.  I'll have to look it up.
Chester French was amazing as usual.
Scouting For Girls' set at the Bowery was probably about 15 times better than at the Annex.  Cassie and Jade were there, and we danced and sang :)I was VERY excited when they played "James Bond" and "Michaela Strachan".

After Scouting For Girls, a band called Delays went on.  According to Roy from S4G, these guys have been around for a LONG time in the UK.  I'd only heard of them just recently.  After seeing them live, I bought two of their CDs, and am searching for the third.  GREAT band, check them out.

Cassie, Jade, and I somehow ended up at the Highline last night for the Perez Hilton party.
Lady Ga Ga is freaking incredible, and Perez REALLY knows how to throw a party.  And Cassie, Jade,and I are freaks of nature.
Perez Madonna dance partes are amaaaaaaze.  Jade and I made a Perez sandwich.

Today I wandered the city in the rain.  I ate goldfish crackers from Food Emporium.  And I've gotten some CDs and Crumbs cupcakes and FAMIGLIAAAAA brocolli pizzA!!!!!!!

I also ate the ever-famous S'Mac.  Yum yum yum!!!

Tomorrow and Monday...we'll see what trouble I can get into :)

I go home on Monday, and back to work on Tuesday :(

It's been amazing so far.  Lovesssss!!!!!  My phone is dying...but I'll be alive soon :)  I'm off to watch SNL with Adele, and checking my blog with the "list of stuff to do in NYC", to see what I've done and what's next.

ROCK!!!!!!!!!

I'm getting ready to lay down and sleep for the first time since Tuesday morning.  It is now officially Thursday morning, at 1:49am.

I woke up Tuesday morning, and I worked until about 4:30.  Cathy drove me to the airport.

My flight was late, so I ate a burrito and started reading more of Breaking Dawn.  Tough book to get through, I tell ya.  Too much internal thoughts.

My flight landed about an hour late in Philly, and Cassie came to pick me up.  We stopped for fries and other goodies on the way to her home in Brooklyn.

We spent a few hours laughing, maybe even crying, as Lauren cut the Zac Efron pillowcase to make a tube dress for Good Morning America.  Unfortunately, she opted out of attendance.

We got to Good Morning America REALLY early this morning, after each of us took powernaps of 30-40 minutes in length.  We were the first there.

Cassie and I shook Effie's hand on camera, and met him briefly off camera.  He is SUCH a good guy - I'm excited to say that I've met him, and he is just as down to earth as he seems, totally not orange, and totally not gay. He is possibly one of the nicest celebs I've ever met.  Easily the most gracious, which was kind of shocking, given the caliber of his fame.  I think a lot of musicians and actors should take notes from this guy.  He knows how to treat a fan, and he is good at it.  Big props to Effie.

Afterwards, we went back home.  Yeah.  That's right.  I'm calling Brooklyn home now, I guess.

  I slept for about an hour, then ventured off to CMJ panel land!  I attended a panel about online marketing, which was a load of bull - be careful if you go to any of these sorts of panels.  Sometimes the truth is not out there....

After that panel, in the same room, Spring Awakening took shape. And my world took a new form.

Steven Sater (lyricist, and writer), Duncan Sheik (composer) and Tom Hulce (producer), along with Eryn Murman, Morgan, and Hunter from Spring's current cast, held an hour and a half discussion/performance of Spring Awakening.

I think I might have died a little.  In a good way.

Hearing the 3 men behind the play explain EXACTLY what process they went through when creating the masterpiece, and hearing them share their experiences alongside musical interludes was a once in a lifetime opportunity that I will never forget.  I got to meet all three of them after their panel speeches, and I'm still kind of in shock.  That musical means SO much to me.  I don't care if youre a Broadway geek, or an indie rocker...check out the play.  You'll be surprised how appealing it is.

I was going to head home, but decided a warm jacket was needed in the rest of this week's journeys.  New York is COLD, man!!!!

So I found a jacket, ate a burger, and met up with Cassie on the same subway train.  Coincidentally.  Creepy.

We went to this British networking party, and I got a goody bag with lots of CDs and a BBC mug!  hahahaha  There was a band in the basement - Talk to Angels.  They reminded me of what would happen if McFLY and The Lashes and The Matches mated.  They had the same style/look as McFLY and it freaked me out in a good way.

We went from there to the Life Cafe :)  BEST burritos EVER.  If you're ever in New York and need a burrito, that's your place.

We went from there to Angels & Kings, where we drank cheap vodkas.

From there, we cabbed it to the Annex, where all of my wildest dreams came true.

The Annex was overpacked.  Standing room only was an understatement.

After one band, it happened.

Scouting For Girls.

Roy.

Life.

I love it like crazy.  They were amazing.  I met Roy after the show.  I think I may have made a fool out of myself, but I was slightly drinky, and honestly...I've waited a LONG time, and flew far to see this band (I flew here to do a lot of things, but it was Scouting For Girls that made this week a requirement).  I deserve a little time to be a creepy fan hahahaha

A photo and a conversation later, and I am PRETTY sure I'm seeing them again tomrorow night at Bowery.  I may have to skip out on HSM3 midnight for this.  And somehow, that's okay.

One last chance to see S4G....I'm taking it.

So the best day ever recap:

- New York!  Cassie, Slaur and all my friendssss

< p>- Effie/Good Morning America

- Steven Sater/Tom Hulce/Duncan Sheik/Spring Awakening

- new jacket because it's COLD here.

- British people!

- New British band

- Life Cafe burrito

- SCOUTING FOR GIRLS.

- ROY.

- and finally, now that it's Thursday...SLEEP.

I am now officially in New York.  I'm seeing Zac Effie in a few hours.  In the flesh.

I don't think it is a secret to anyone by now, that I am in love with a Broadway musical called Spring Awakening.

I could give you the history, back story, and every other detail about this musical...but I'll spare you the probable boredom for now.

I was bumming around on the CMJ Music Marathon website last night, and came across a new daytime panel:

Spring Awakening: Sex, Broadway & Rock 'n Roll!
Hear from Tony Award-winning Broadway producer Tom Hulce and Grammy and Tony Award-winning composer Duncan Sheik on how this indie-rock musical shook up Broadway with its fusion of morality, sexuality and rock 'n roll. The New York Times declared: "Broadway will never be the same!" They will be joined by members of the Broadway cast with selections from the show's ground-breaking score. (Panelists: Duncan Sheik, Tom Hulce, Hunter Parrish, Morgan Karr, Eryn Murman, Steven Sater)

After sending a few E-mail messages in an attempt to borrow a CMJ badge for the day...I will be attending this.  And I will freak out until that moment comes.

I believe...

The rain came today, and it reminded me of being back on the west coast.  And then I got all emo and nostalgic and gross and lonely feeling.  And now I'm stuck in that state.  Awkward.

Tomorrow is Friday (hooray!), then weekend (bigger hooray!), then 2 days of work, then New York (BIGGER hooray!)

One of my best best best besttttt friends from way back in J.high called me the other day.  She is planning to come visit in the middle of November.  If she actually comes, I will probably freak out.  I haven't seen her in a long time, and I love her to death and back.  I don't want to go back to the west coast, but there are some people I would go back to spend some time with, and she's one of them.  So everyone, positive energy that she'll turn in her plane voucher for a Nashville trip!!!

Cathy and my neighbors across the street were playing music when Cathy went to sleep tonight.  They played Sweet Caroline, and Cathy made me come in her room to listen.  They weren't that bad.  I told Cathy we should go over and be teenies.  She fell asleep on the most comfortable bed in the world.

I plan to dance this weekend.  Turn my frown upside down and danceRAWRdance!!!

I also plan to pack this weekend.  and dye my hair.  And prep myself for a fun fun week ahead.

I hate the thought of missing people I love.  I get a pit in the middle of my throat, and it hurts to swallow.  I feel distant from a LOT of people lately, and I miss them more than I can express in words right now.

So to everyone I miss - both near and far in location - "I miss you today, I miss you tomorrow...I miss you" hahahaha  No, but really.  Big hugs, and call/text me.  Don't be a stranger :)

K, off to sleep off this lame emo state I'm in.  Happy almost-Friday...and happy FINALLY autumn!!!!!!

It is now officially the middle of October (happy half-birthday to me!).  WHY oh why is it hot and humid out?  Tomorrow it's supposed to get up to 86 degrees and sunny.

Do you realize that is hotter and sunnier than most July/August summer days where I'm from?  Crazy!

I'm not the kind of person that gets sad seeing the summer go away.  As depressing and emo as it sounds, it's when the rain and clouds of March/April turn into the sunny skies of May that I fear the change...so when the leaves won't turn, and the wind doesn't blow by mid-October like it used to, I get a little antsy.

I look forward to a cold winter.  Please come soon!

If I have to miss one thing about home right now...it's the constant, never-fail forecast for rain.

I'm really excited to see HSM3.  I feel like my TV is forcing it into my brain.  First Ol' Corbie was on Hannah Montana last night (lookin haaawt, I might add), and now it's like every other commercial is a 5-minute preview for HSM3.

K, ready for Oct. 24th now.

It's 4:00pm, and I'm still in bed.  I should feel lazy, but I don't.

I haven't had a day like this in a LONG time - a day to myself to do with it whatever I choose.  I haven't said a word since I woke up about 4 hours ago, even though my roomie is home.  It feels so good to just vegetate, if only for a few hours.

I watched a movie I've been meaning to watch for WEEKS now (The Russian Dolls - it's a sequel to one of my all time fav movies of all time, L'Auberge Espagnole).  It was good, but in my opinion, paled in comparison to The Spanish Apartment.  Rent both of them if you get a chance.  Don't let foreign film/subtitles scare you away.  They're pretty much amazing. 

I need to clean my room.  I've really let myself go.

Goal:  Clean and organized by the time I leave for New York.

I'm going to go enjoy the rest of my weekend in my sock monkey pajamas :)

I wrote the most epic blog last night, clicked submit...and it told me to log in, and wouldn't let me back in.  So I'm doing a not-so epic rewrite.  It's kind of ironic, considering my secret.

In honor of October - Breast cancer awareness month, I have wanted to post about this: A long time ago, one of my best friend's moms was diagnosed with breast cancer. She fought a good fight. We all went to the same church, and I'll never forget the day everyone wore hats...so she wouldn't feel uncomfortable with her newly covered bald head. I'll never forget the smile, and the sense of relief that came over her when she saw the entire congregation celebrating her life, and her family with as small a gesture as a hat.
It reminds me of another story I have. One of my friends had a cancer scare a while back...and our tight-knit group of friends made a promise. If she had to lose her hair through radiation treatment, like my friend's mother did so many years ago, we would ALL shave our heads so she wouldn't have to be alone.
I think support is very important, and comfort emotionally and physically is something EVERYONE can give with or without money. That kind of support shouldn't stop when the cancer is cured, or when the life is taken - so my tip of the day is to support those you love with the battles they fight every day.

Last night I went to an amazingly inspiring event.
Most of you, I'm sure have heard of PostSecret.com. If you haven't heard about it or seen it, go now. It's a site where people send in their secrets anonymously, for all the world to see. I view it as therapeutic. I think releasing some of your innermost fears, things you don't want to tell people, things you DO want to tell people...I think it is all very important.

The man that started Post Secret covered a lot in his short speech. One of the first things he covered was the internet, and blogs, as means of communication.
He stated that PostSecret.com is just a blog. Blogs are a new form of communication that are helping the silent be heard, helping communities grow both offline and online, helping people that wouldn't normally be helped...etc. The internet is a place where you can be anonymous if you want...or you can be candid with strangers...who will soon be friends. He said he was excited to see what the next blog will be that will change the world. He's excited to see the next blog 'phenomenon'. I'm excited to see if TheOneLove.org will be that blog site. I'm excited to see if Cassie and Jade will tour the country speaking about their experiences with the bloggers, charities, charity events, and One Love shows. Maybe?

Frank started this project 4 years ago as a little art project. He passed out pre-addressed notecards in Washington, DC, and told people he collected secrets. He was surprised to see people actually started mailing the notecards back. He was even more surprised when people started mailing in their own postcards. Now, 4 years later, he has released 3 (or 4?) books of cards, and has millions of visitors on his website. He goes around the nation and speaks to college campuses about his secrets, and other peoples' secrets, and opens the floor for more secrets.

Frank talked to us last night about why he started the project...and how the project started thoughts in him. He could tell that he was helping people. He gets countless secrets from people who are depressed, or suicidal, and haven't told anyone. He showed some of them to us. He used to work for the suicide hotline - and is still a major supporter of it. You may recall this music video:

Frank supplied the All American Rejects' director with secrets he had collected from strangers...and he was offered $1,000 for them. He declined the money, and asked that they instead DOUBLE that to $2,000 and donate it to the National Suicide Prevention hotline.

He told us a story that stuck with me. The best way to stop something, or stop someone from doing something, is to make an obstacle. There was a man who thought about jumping off of the Golden Gate Bridge to end his life. He is still alive today...because there were 6 lanes of heavy traffic between him and the edge of the bridge. Makes sense, huh?
One girl got up at the end of the speech, and shared her story. Her sister was suicidal...and she was the only one that knew. And once everyone else figured it out, nobody cared how SHE felt, they only care about the sister. She was scared shitless. And nobody knew. That was her secret.
I think that just goes to show how many people that suicide touches...without us even knowing. People send in similar secrets to Frank every day...about losing someone to suicide, or being scared for a suicidal friend. But no one knows it...

I digress.
Frank shared some funny secrets, some not-so-funny secrets, some embarrassing secrets, some common secrets, and some illegal secrets. He also shared his own secret. One that he hadn't told anyone until recently. It was something small, and some would even think it was insignificant...but it had been eating away at him for so long...that he felt a sense of freedom the moment he wrote it down and mailed it to himself.
He encouraged us to share a secret with a friend, or a group of friends when we left the auditorium. If we didn't feel comfortable doing that...he encouraged us to write it down and mail it in. Or do SOMETHING to stop keeping this secret from the world...or from ourselves.

So, here is my secret.

I have tried to write my post for breast cancer awareness month at least 5 or 6 times now. Don't believe me? They're all saved as drafts.
I haven't wanted to post it...because I'm afraid my friend will see that I'm talking about his mom, and that I'm blogging in support of his family...and that I haven't talked to him in almost 2 years, since his dad left them. So I guess my secret is that, I'm afraid to be an arm of support. I'm afraid I'll say the wrong thing. I'm afraid he'll see that I still care about him...but I'm afraid he'll see that I'm afraid to, and I don't want him to know that.  I don't want anyone to know that I'm not as strong as I say I am...that I may not be able to be the friend you can cry to, because as pathetic as it is, I'm afraid that I don't know what to say.  I cut people out of my life in the past, because I just couldn't deal with it, or handle it.  I couldn't be his friend anymore at the precise moment he needed me to be his friend.  Because I am selfish and afraid.  And that is my secret.

Not the coolest secret ever...I'm not proud of it, but Frank was right. I felt a sense of freedom when I shared that secret with Jessica last night as we stood up from his speech.  And I'm ready to change that, and face my fear head on...and just talk to him.

So now it's your turn...what's your secret?

Cathy and Jade (?) and I are heading out to The Rutledge in Nashville tonight to see fellow One Lovers, Atomic Tom and The Wellingtons!

You can watch the show here, and join us :)

PS: I know, I'm a nerd.  I just thought it was pretty cool that you can watch shows streaming live from The Rutledge :)

http://www.mirror.co.uk/celebs/3am/2008/07/16/dougie-danny-tom-and-harry-will-spend-year-in-america-115875-20645219/

I see no problem in this being posted more than once, more than twice even.  I just realized this was posted ont heir site 3 months ago...why did it take us so long to find it?
In any case....I'm kinda freakin out.

Dougie, Danny, Tom and Harry will spend year in America

I need a vacation like WOAH. As I fantasized about flying away, things just started falling into place so well that I decided that the time HAD to be right. So on October 21st at 5:55pm, I will go to my favorite place in the world: the airport!!! I'll land in Philadelphia at about 10pm ET, and Cassie will whisk me away to NYC, where we will drink vodka at Angels & Kings until odd hours of the night.
I will be packing a full schedule into my trip, and will fly out of Philly on the 27th to come back to normal life here in Nashville...

Here is my crazy "I'm a total tourist, and I just need a week of stuff I can't do in Nashville" vacation i my head. We'll see if I actually end up doing everything on this list:

1) I just cried about 2 minutes ago because I purchased one ticket to the BRING ON THE BRITS! show at The Annex on October 22nd. 4 words: Scouting. For. Girls. FINALLY.

Anyone that wishes to join me there should, because as of now, I'm going alone, and Scouting For Girls are pretty dang incredible. I understand if you would rather see Midway State or Hanson that night though. All will be forgiven.

EDIT...because they are playing on October 23 (Thursdat) at Bowery Ballroom with CHESTER FRENCH and DELAY now too.  invitation to join is still open.

2) Speaking of all will be forgiven...I also plan to see Spring Awakening from the stage.

I hope to one day sit in seat CC7 or BB11. Those are the seats next to ones that Hanschen (Matt Doyle <3), and Moritz Stiefel are in at some point during the show. Not that I'm obsessed or anything. My goal is to walk away with a "Totally Fucked" kicking story, or a "Melchior spit on me" story. If you can make this happen, pray tell. ...again, Not that I'm obsessed or anything.

3)

and

with Adele in Poughkeepsie. Side note: Poughkeepsi reminds me of Charlotte in Mexico in the Sex and the City movie hahaha Pudding. It also reminds me of a Something Corporate song.

Other than that...
4) I hope to see a museum or an art gallery or something.

5) I want to eat a burrito at the Life Cafe

6) I want to drink alcohol and eat free pizza at that one place Cassie and I went to and drank the grossest Tom Collins ever.
7) I also want to eat bagels from Hot n Crusty
8) and cupcakes from Crumbs.

9) I also would love to try that MacnCheese place from Eric's legendary blog.
10) I want to say goodbye to Virgin Megastore in T-square.
11) I want to karoke to McFLY and Lil Chris songs.

Basically, I just want to be an annoying person on vacation doing everything that I can't do in Nashville. :)

I also just now realized that this is High School Musical 3 release week, and that might make for some interesting television appearances. hmmm...Cassie????

Firstly, Happy Birthday One Love!!!!
Secondly,

Sonic kids' meals come with these little toys. I collected all 16 of the summer series about a year or so ago (thanks to the help of my friends). Jade called me the other day and told me she had some GREAT news for me.
I assumed McFLY was coming to America based on her tone of voice. No. She called to tell me that Sonic had HALLOWEEN tots, and that she was getting me Pumpkin Tot!
In the two days since then, I have gotten Were-tot, Skele-tot, Monster tot, and Arachna-tot. I hope to get Count tot-ula soon.

So today after work, Jess and I were driving to a show (more about that later...), and every exit off the interstate was closed. People were crashing into each other because it was very unexpected.
The other direction of traffic was at a standstill, and out of the traffic came about 20 or so flashing police motorcycles.
Welcome to Nashville republican candidate, John McCain. Obama probably didn't cause interstate multi-car crashes when he landed a little later. Just saying ;)

So, we got to our destination, and took our seats. The show was postponed about a half an hour, to ensure everyone could make it, even with the presidential candidates motorcade.

Then it happened.
Taylor Swift started singing "Photograph" with Def Leppard.
And Def Leppard sang "Teardrops on My Guitar" with Taylor Swift...and so on and so forth until "Pour Some Sugar On Me". Seriously one of the most awkward shows I have ever been to. But somehow, it worked. I'm not the world's biggest T.Swift fan, and certainly not a big Def Leppard fan, but it was a really cool thing to see such different musicians coming together and playing each others' songs. The crowd was just as ridiculous, if you can imagine.
So one thing I like about Taylor Swift is her (and her marketing team's) devotion to her fans. She REALLY appears to love them all, and appreciate them all. I don't know her to know if that appearance is true or not, but she plays it so well that you can't help but love the girl (or be annoyed with her...either one...)
Anyway, so EVERY time I've seen her, if someone yells "I love you Taylor!", she yells back "Oh ym God I love you TOO!!!", or something to that effect.
Today was the first time I ever saw her LAUGH at someone for yelling "I love you Taylor!", instead of loving them back. It was my friend Jess. Taylor laughed at her from the stage. hahahahahaha

In all, it was an odd night, but a good one. I see Taylor Swift in a different light now, and I have now seen "Pour Some Sugar On Me" live in a little theatre at Opryland. Words I never thought I'd say.
And tomorrow, I shall brave the streets of Nashville, in hopes that no more motorcades block my exit.

In my attempts to one-up Malaysia, I took a look at the pictures Jessica took of our food at Bo Bo.  Cathy blogged about Bo Bo one time (fortune cookie haha).  We eat there often - she more often than I - and I am craving it like CRAZY!!!
THAT is the Sesame Chicken. Basically, it's tempura fried chicken with honey/candy coating and sesame seeds. Served with soup, an egg roll, fried rice, and sometimes a little donut. At lunch, this feeds me for $4.95

Ok, so all of your food makes Bo Bo look like a sad sad place, but I'll take what I can get lol
I think I should start learning how to cook farm ostrich meat, and curry fish head.

My dad called me this evening to tell me some sad news.

My uncle Ed passed away today.  He's been in the hospital (a big surprise to me a couple of weeks ago on Fall Fun Day), and today he lost his fight.

I just wanted to make a post in memory of him.  I'm sad I never got to send him the new Faith Hill like I told him I would.  I'll never forget the support I got from him when he learned that I was moving to Tennessee.  He was excited for me, not only because I was moving up in the world and living out one of my dreams...but also because that put him one degree closer to Faith :)  He gave me some moving money, to help me out with all of the costs involved with moving across the country - something small, but SO so helpful at the time.

I'm glad I could give him something this past year through Lori McKenna.  I was able to get him onto a Country Cruise with one of Faith's biggest songwriters.  It was the last time I talked to him, and I'm glad it was a happy moment.  I've always said - if I'm able to help someone with my 'connections', I will.  And I'm glad I did, at least once.  This one means a lot to me.

I love you Uncle Ed, and I will miss you.  Rest in peace, and we'll see you later.

"Those you've known and lost still walk behind you. All alone, their song still seems to find you"

I just got home from the show that I have blogged about a few times - The EbE/Veronicas/Hanson show.

I am dead tired...so I'll make this short...

But this show was made for me!  The crowd SUCKED (seriously, who just stands there with a dazed look in their eyes for an entire show?), but Brinn, Jess, and I danced our little booties off!!!  My feet are swollen (tip #1, don't wear pointy-toed flats when you're going to go insane).

Everybody Else's set was slow...but TOTALLY worth the 4-year wait.  Their time slot got cut off before they could sing Rich Girls Poor Girls...but I might get over it someday.

The Veronicas were effing increddddsssss.  They sang every song we wanted them to (within reason), and we danced and annoyed the femmebots around us hahaha

I ran upstairs and hung out with some work friends between bands.  They laughed at the fact that my friends and I were literally the only people down on the floor that looked even remotely alive....

Hanson - AMAZING as usual.  those guys are so so so talented, and have such staying power.  Not to mention their hearts.  They are SO dedicated to their charities.  If you haven't checked it out yet, go to takethewalk.com  How inspiring!!!

I think the most funny thing of the night haaas to be the fact that Everybody Else sells a striped T-shirt.  Which any EbE fan would find funny. HAHAHAHAHA

And...if I have to mention a negative to go with the entire night of amazing positivity...Carrick Moore Gerety was not in the best mood ever, or he is just that way.  Oh well - he had to run to his adoring fans at the merch table haha

The end :)

I have gotten a lot of really good, long anticipated albums lately.  Most recently: McFLY Radio:Active, the new Spring Awakening live EP, James Morrison Songs For You, Truths For Me, and Jack's Mannequin The Glass Passenger.

I'll admit, Im not a huge Jack's Mannequin fan.  I mean, I own both CDs and some Something Corporate...but I'm not a hardcore 'gotta have every hidden track, gotta drive 500 miles to see this live, gotta make out with Andrew!' kind of fan.  I have listed Everything In Transit as one of my fav albums in the past, but I'd say I'm simply a fan of the music for now.  I don't have the time to be too obsessed with another band haha

There are quite a few songs on the new album that just make me think...and my interns can tell you that some of the songs make me super emo haha.

I think a very important message is that music can (and DOES) make a difference in peoples' lives every moment of every day.  One song can make all of the difference in the world to a person.

One song on the CD is called Hammers and Strings.  The song gives me chills.  Songs don't give me chills often.  The use of a song as a cure makes me smile.

"...Come on, write me a song
Give me something to trust
Just promise you won't let it be
Just the keys that you touch.
Give me something to believe in,
A breath from the breathing
So write it down,
I don't think that I'll close my eyes
'Cause lately I'm not dreaming
So what's the point in sleeping?
It's just that at night,
I've got nowhere to hide"

To the sleepless, this is my reply:
"I'll write you a lullaby"

Four minutes and thirty-four seconds can change your mood, your outlook, and maybe even your life.  And that is reason #2235697432526 that I love music.

Before I started blogging here at TOL, I used to complain that people didn't post often enough.  Now my last post is buried under everyone elses', and I am posting for the first time in almost a week.

I haven't written anything for a few days, simply because I feel like all of my thoughts have been veering toward the negative side of life, and I don't wanna pull people into that.

So today, I'm writing to try and pull myself OUT of that!!!

This past week has been insane at work.  I've just felt my plate getting more and more full...My attempts to cure this negativity have failed: Chinese food - no go.  Gyros?  Nope.  Pear Cider night turned into me drunk and awake by myself for quite a while.
But today, it feels like I can see a light at the end of this tunnel of to-do lists.  I'm leaving work early to get our shower fixed, and eat food at Cathy's work building's party!
...not to mention that tomorrow is Friday :)  Everybody Else, The Veronicas, and Hanson anyone?!?!

Yesterday Cathy and I went to the mall.  There's a new gigantic (I'm not kidding...gigantic) Forever 21 store, and I have been needing some new clothes.  We were there for like 2 hours trying on EVERYTHING.  I think I need to go back and buy more from my "not tonight" pile.  I think we pissed off the dressing rooms lady, because we literally tried on the entire store.
I finally found some new jeans.  I'm excited about them.  They fit REALLY well.  Maybe that's where this new positive energy is coming from.  New jeans always make me feel good haha

We were going to go to the airport to simulate a fake vacation.  We are both itching to get out of Nashville for some R&R and adventures...but neither of us has had the funds or time to go.  We asked ChaCha where we should go.  They told us to go to some imaginary island.  That was not helpful.  Then they told us to go to Hawaii.  How cliche is that?

I'm going to pick up Jade from the airport (for real, not pretend) tonight at 10.  She's getting back from adventures in NYC (which you've all read about, or experienced, I'm sure).  Maybe I'll pretend I'm flying somewhere tonight. 

Where should I pretend to fly to?  Judging by the food mentions in the past few blogs, I think I might pretend to fly to Malaysia.  Jade is going to try and get me Famiglia pizza so I can chow on that tonight...so maybe I'll pretend I've just returned from a refreshing trip to NYC.

I'm off to complete my to-do list for the day here at work.  Still surrounded by Randy Travis boxes, but they should be gone by next week.

It's a brand new month, and a brand new day.  and I've got a fake plane to catch.

A few years ago, my friend Deejay and I went to a show in Eugene at this venue called the W.O.W. Hall.  The capacity at W.O.W. is 400 for a general admission show, and 250 for seated.  I don't think I've ever even heard of them doing a seated show there, that would be absurd. haha

Anyway.  Deejay was dying to see Rooney, and I was infatuated at the time with the local powerpop band The Lashes.  $5 for 2 bands in an intimate setting like the W.O.W.?  Cool.

We got there, and noticed a 3rd merch table in the hallway on the way in.  they literally had mismatched old (maybe used?) looking T-shirts on a coat rack...spraypainted with the band's logo.  They were giving away free stickers...with paid advertisements on the back.  They had burned CDs for $3, featuring 15 tracks - all hand-stickered from a home printer on cheap cases.  Needless to say - the first impression was: Awesome, a hard working band, wasn't on the bill...let's see how long I can sit through this.

Little did I know they would soon become the focus of that night, and a new band to add to my "top 5 favorite bands" list.  We were drawn in from the first note, and forgot all about Rooney and The Lashes.  That night was all about Everybody Else.

It's hard to believe that 4 years (almost) have passed since that night.  I've only seen Everybody Else once since then, and I missed all but one song in their set that time.  I've been hungry for more...but they typically only tour up and down I-5.  Faaaar from where I am now.

Everybody Else had a show scheduled in Portland, Oregon the day AFTER I moved out of my apartment.  Literally...the day I started my drive to Nashville, Everybody Else was playing a show 2 minutes away from my old home.  Crushing.

Last summer, they had a show scheduled in North Carolina of all places!  They ended up canceling (rumored to be due to a friend's hospitalization.  I can't complain about that one - that would be selfish of me).

So imagine my surprise when I opened my E-mail from Everybody Else a couple of weeks ago, and saw "Nashville, TN - October 3rd - Wildhorse Saloon"

Less than one week from this moment, I will be dancing like an idiot to Meat Market, and Alone In The World, and swaying back and forth to Longest Hour Of My Life.

And I am WAY excited.

The lineup for the show is:  Everybody Else, The Veronicas, and Hanson.

Can you feel the excitement????

I've been feeling REALLY homesick this past week.  I don't know what it is.  The other day it just hit me like a ton of bricks.  I woke up in the morning at like 4am, and just sat there, thinking about the fact that it was only 2am back on the west coast...and chances are that if I still lived there, I'd still be awake - probably hanging out with my friends; wandering the streets of Portland, or bumming around the WalMart in Eugene...or taking pictures with the Space Needle in Seattle.

Every little decision we make shapes where our lives go.  It's so insane to look back on my 21 years of existence and see which road each choice I made took me down.

The most literal in the "road" analogy was my decision to turn in my wings, and go to school - in hopes to eventually land a position in the music biz.  My good friends have heard this story a million times, but I just have to revisit it every once in a while...

I was at a fork in the road - well, technically a fork in the interstate.  I could continue north on I-5, or I could veer to the west onto I-405.

I-405 leads to the part of downtown Portland where I would eventually make my home in The Broadway at Portland State University...and work and wait for the golden ticket out.

I-5 (by way of I-84) lead to the airport...where I already held the golden ticket to a position with Continental Airlines as a flight attendant for their new fleet of puddle-jumper flights.

Needless to say - I chose college.  I survived one semester of speech and communication courses, and came out of my shell socially more than I ever had before.  I made what I hope will be lifelong friendships, and I kept working until one day two amazing friends helped to bring me to my destiny here in Nashville.

I guess that's more or less the short version of that story.  I could go more in-depth to the apartment itself, the dead guy next door, the amazing neighbors, the city of Portland, my new car, and leaving the west coast behind...along with all of my hair...but that can wait for another day when I haven't already written too much :)  As much as I hated that state...there are enough things I miss about it, to eventually bring me back to visit.

Basically...I just wanted to write about how much I think about you guys.  I haven't forgotten you.  Maybe I'm selfish for staying east of the Rockies. But did you ever think that maybe you're selfish for staying west? Or maybe I'm just being stubborn.

We'll meet again soon...I promise.

"Maybe someday I will see you again, and you'll look me in my eyes and call me your friend."

Ben's blog inspired me to share my latest venture.  Like Ben, I've been reading a lot lately too.  Unlike Ben, I'm not an avid reader.  In fact, I haven't picked up a book by choice since 5th grade.  But I got pulled into the latest young adult reading fad.  Twilight.

Sorry Cathy, but I beat you to the punch.

Cathy is sitting on my bed reading out loud, because we are finally both on the exact same page.  I hate book 2 so far, and we're about halfway through.  But I can't stop reading it!!!  I've heard it gets better after this book.  So I'm ready.

Twilight did something no other book has done, ever.  It made me feel.

I'm so consumed with the story, wishing for a great love of my own.  I love it and hate it all at the same time, and I can't put it down.

More references to this book probably to come :)

Silver Volvo.

Every once in a while, I may blog about how I know the other bloggers on this site, and where we all fit in the puzzle of life. Today, I will start with Jade. Jade and I met one day on The Click Five message boards. I did not like her, but Joey made us be friends. Then one day in Washington DC, we met in person for the first time at Cafe Mozart.

Today, I was reading Perez (because that's what I do), and I came across this:

So Jade...this one's for you.

I'm at work.  I'm supposed to be sorting through the 25 boxes of "Vintage Randy Travis Merch" behind me...but I'm not.

The boxes are towering over me, and they're filled with the last of the T-shirts, jackets, sweatshirts, and hats that were created in a factory in 1987.

Considering how many years ago that was - I'm actually kind of surprised at how much of this is left in these boxes.  I swear some of them have never been opened, and it looks like the 21-year-old tape on them is beginning to get crusty.  I'm even more surprised that it's my job to market the contents of these boxes to Randy Travis fans via the internet.

I'm not even kidding.

So, as you can see, starting my blog on The One Love seems much more appealing.

Like the other new trial-bloggers, I have been hearing about The One Love, and watching it grow through my good friends Cassie and Jade.  Unlike Lauren, I was not subtle or quiet about the fact that I wanted to blog haha
I'm excited and proud to be a part of the site now, and I am very excited at the possibility of it being open for ANYONE to blog someday!  Imagine how much more money our charities will get!!!  Send your friends here - it's all for charity :)

The charity I selected to support with my blog (the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention) is something very close to my heart, and something I may blog about when I get emo in the future.  In the meantime, check out their website (there's a link under my picture) if you'd like to learn more.

I'm going to get back to those boxes.  Register if you haven't yet, and start reading all of the new blogs, and leave comments! 

Thanks for stopping by, and I'll see you all soon :)
-Cabo