The Quest for the Golden Turducken

This may be the most important entry ever

In the following paragraph, I will describe to you my top secret plans to intercept John Madden's Turducken and feast on it with my closet friends and neighbors.

Here is a topographical map of the terrain. It will be a treacherous ordeal, but a quest that will absolutely be worth the risk. Please review.



Very simply, I will (with the help of a few select colleagues) attempt to breach the infamous 'John Madden Outback Bus'.

While this sounds simple, I will have to avoid a variety of torturous traps and pitfalls, namely the 34 plasma televisions that line the walls of the lobby. After passing through their glossy clarity, I will have to mentally ready myself to embark into the Ace Hardware-forest (a forest of hardware, purchased exclusively from Ace Hardware). Once inside, I must defeat athlete's foot with Tinactin and complete an undefeated season of Madden 2009 with the Oakland Raiders (a nearly impossible feat). I will then disembark from the chaos, only to find myself in the back lounge - where I will find the Golden Turducken.

With rudimentary explosives, I will blast a hole in the side of the bus and escape an all but certain fiery death. Once outside I will simply need to slip past John's partner Al Davis and retreat into the Texas night.

word.

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Youngblood