Silence is not so golden.

I am, at heart, a people person.

That being said, I was also very shy as a child. I'm no longer shy, but I have trouble making friends with people if I don't feel like I connect with them on some level. I love meeting people and having a lot of friends or at least good acquaintances, but I always crave a very personal, close relationship with a good friend. I have that friend, but she's about two and a half hours away and neither of us has any way of seeing each other any time soon. We used to hang out a lot, and I'm having withdrawals from that close companionship.

THAT being said, I'm a little bit miserable right now. School is going really well. I love IU: the campus, the classes, the teachers, and the people in my classes. However, I've been so focused on getting down to business and making sure I'm being serious-minded about everything and managing my time that now, when I have absolutely nothing to do, I have no one to kill time with. I've met so many people, and I haven't disliked any of them. I've even hung out with a few of them on occasion. But I haven't really made a close set of friends, and right now I feel like that's exactly what I need.

A lot of relationships these days are so shallow. That sounds really cynical. Perhaps I should rephrase. I think a lot of friendships today are unhealthy because they are not based on a need for companionship but on a need for status or release from boredom. (Although I can honestly say I'm about at that 'release from boredom' stage.) I see all of these pictures of people on facebook with their friends. Sometimes I wonder how close some of these people really are. Sure, you go out and party with people, but do you really know them? Will they be there for you if something terrible happens, or will they look at you awkwardly and say, "I'm sorry. That really stinks."?

I'm not sure where any of this is coming from. Please don't misunderstand me; this is not a cry for help or anything drastic and desperate like that. This is merely me musing as the result of a rather lonely, uneventful day that has several hours left to go.

It's weird not being at home. At home I had my parents there, at least, if I needed some human interaction. I took that for granted. Way, way, way for granted.

Maybe I should go call them and tell them that. It's probably not a bad idea.